


Touches

by Ki-chang (legendofthedwelf)



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Character Study, Cute Im Changkyun | I.M, Friendship/Love, Hugs, Kihyun loves Changkyun so much, Literal Sleeping Together, M/M, changki rise, soft, thinking about touches, tipsy Changkyun
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-01
Updated: 2020-08-01
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:28:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25648840
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/legendofthedwelf/pseuds/Ki-chang
Summary: He does know that every single one of Changkyun's touches, the touches he gives freely and voluntarily, are genuine. Even drunk, or tired.Changkyun wouldn't hug him if he didn't want to.And that's enough for Kihyun.Kihyun is both a touchy person, and not.
Relationships: Im Changkyun | I.M & Yoo Kihyun, Im Changkyun | I.M/Yoo Kihyun
Comments: 2
Kudos: 76





	Touches

**Author's Note:**

> Idk what this is, I had a random thought and then just went with it. I wrote this within an hour  
> Tbh I'm kinda always thinking about how Kihyun is both touchy and not. It's something interesting to think about and explore. And I love him a lot. This in no way means I'm assuming things about who he is and how his mind works and what he's thinking, this is just for fun and self-indulgent

Kihyun both is and isn't a touchy person. 

His hands are often found on someone's shoulders. Squeezing, patting, hitting, pulling, pushing. Arms draped over two people, fingers gripping shoulders while he's in between them, leaning in and watching and observing. It's comforting, holding onto someone, casually, just a simple point of contact. It's comforting behind held unto, though he's picky about who's allowed to go how far.

He's both touchy and not. He doesn't hug people, not really. Not on his own, without any reason. He's not like Jooheon or Minhyuk, clinging onto people whenever he feels like it, for fun or to tease or to annoy. Sure, when it's for a game, he does it. A team effort, no problem. Celebrating, of course. But also, not really. He hugs his friends in greeting. His shakes hands. But it's both easier and harder with people he's closer to, a lot closer.

He's both touchy, and not. He doesn't go around seeking comfort in physical touch for himself. He readily gives it, to whoever needs it. If someone offers, he accepts. But also, not really. Because he's not really touchy and his members know it, so they respect his space. They know him.

Sometimes it feels like he doesn't really know himself that well.

He likes hugs. Loves it when he can hug babies, puppies, cats. He likes it when something or someone clings to him. But also, again, not really. It depends on who and what. He doesn't mind Jooheon hanging all over him, because it's Jooheon. It's a little awkward hugging Hyunwoo, but that's who they are. They are good friends, just not that touchy with each other, and that's okay. Minhyuk is different too. Minhyuk… Minhyuk's allowed to do whatever he wants and Kihyun's allowed to push him away whenever he wants. Hyungwon is - Hyungwon. Hoseok can do whatever he wants anyway, because no one has the heart nor the will to ever deny him. Kihyun is no exception. Hoseok knows that and takes full advantage. No one escapes a combined Hoseok and Jooheon attack.

Kihyun's both touchy and not. As is Changkyun. Changkyun loves touching people, hugging people, giving affection freely and unconditionally. But he also doesn't do it. He's careful about it, shy and hesitant at times. Changkyun doesn't reject affection. Lets himself be manhandled, pulled closer, squished and squeezed and teased and suffocated. He never admits it but he relishes in it, the affection anyone close to him offers to pour on him. Changkyun is a beautiful puzzle in that regard. When someone needs reassurance, a gentle touch, comfort and closeness, he's the first one to be there.

Changkyun doesn't pull away from touch and affection, unless it becomes too much. When the focus on him is too much, too strong, too prolonged, he doesn't like it. It's not that he necessarily minds, but he's also not comfortable.

Changkyun doesn't pull away from his members. 

He pulls away from Kihyun.

Kihyun is both touchy and not. It's both awkward and not, hugging the members.

He likes hugging Changkyun. Changkyun is warm, and broad, and curvy, and soft. He is firm and gentle, reassurance and comfort personified. Changkyun pulls away from him.

He used to be touchy with Changkyun. Used to hug him, shower him in affection, keep him safe, protect him. Changkyun grew up. Changkyun gives affection freely. He doesn't to Kihyun, not really. Kihyun's not touchy, after all, not really. 

They care for each other. Small gestures filled with understanding and support, subtle actions that say I'm here, I see you. I'm here for you. Making sure their clothes are on properly, brushing away a stray strand of hair, teasing words and grins, competitive stares, sometimes too harsh hand gestures. Kihyun readily pulls Changkyun closer in group photos. Readily leans on him, hands on broad shoulders. Sways into his orbit without realizing it. Changkyun both leans towards him and away. Changkyun looks at him. Changkyun smiles at him, laughs when he's being silly, outright cackles at Kihyun's misery. Kihyun doesn't mind. Soaks it all up, every smidgen of attention Changkyun pays him. Makes sure to pay it back tenfold, hundred fold, when he can. If he can. Looking at Changkyun is too much sometimes. Too overwhelming.

The urge to hug him is too overwhelming.

The want to be hugged by him grows stronger every day.

Every little touch both soothes and stokes the flames.

Kihyun wants to touch him. Wants to pile so much love and affection on him. Wants to keep him for himself and soak in the warmth of him, lap up the feeling of secure and calm and love.

Changkyun's love language is little gestures, little presents, little acts of kindness and thoughtfulness. Little, and yet so large in impact.

Kihyun wants to hold him.

On a rare occasion that Changkyun is out with his friends and comes back actually more than a little bit tipsy, he finds Kihyun greeting him. Kihyun who couldn't sleep because thoughts of the younger kept him up, who heard the door open at 2 am in the morning and knew that it would be Changkyun. Kihyun, who just wants to see him so bad.

Changkyun looks surprised, cheeks red and mouth open and eyes wide when Kihyun comes to him with a glass of water in his hand, and then grins so happily Kihyun almost lets the glass slip from his fingers. He is not drunk, but he's intoxicated, as is Kihyun, just by being near him. Changkyun is pliant as he drinks the water and lets Kihyun unlace his shoes, obediently steps out of them and together they pull off his jacket, the process going so smoothly as if they are a well oiled machine. Changkyun sways towards him, having the glass hazardly discarded on a nearby counter, and slings his arms around Kihyun's shoulders. Clings to him tightly with a happy hum, mumbles something about Kihyun smelling nice and buries his face into the crook of Kihyun's neck.

Kihyun knows he's blushing, knows he glows with happiness and shyness and languidly returns the embrace, taking a moment to let it sink in that Changkyun,  _ Changkyun _ , is hugging him, and tightens his hold. Changkyun giggles tiredly, adorably, licks at Kihyun's neck because his capability of filtering himself is absolutely gone.

Kihyun loves it when he's being clung unto. Small animals, babies, children. He doesn't mind being hugged but he loves it when someone clings to him. That's why he doesn't mind Jooheon or Hoseok all over him, because they cling; it's not hugs with them anymore, it's just downright clinging.

Right now, Changkyun is clinging to him. Changkyun is warm, and soft, and his body melts against his own, his back curving within Kihyun's arms  _ just right _ .

He thinks he's going to cry.

Instead, he mumbles something about getting Changkyun cleaned up and ready for bed, and Changkyun mumbles something in agreement, and then they both shuffle into the direction of the stairs. Still entwined in each other.

They topple over on the second step, Changkyun bursting into breathless giggles, and Kihyun laughs too, can't help it.

Somehow, they get up the stairs, Changkyun immediately disappearing in the bathroom after dropping his phone into Kihyun's hands. Kihyun stares at it, dumbfounded. He idles in the corridor, mind blank and body still tingling with the memory of Changkyun in his arms, and then said boy is in front of him again, stark naked, breath smelling fresh, hair wet and messy. Kihyun takes a look at him and then pulls him into his bedroom.

Changkyun, still tipsy and drowsy by now, walks with determination to the window that shows the neighboring rooftops, the warm light from Kihyun's bedside lamp illuminating the entirety of his naked back while the moonlight from outside shines all over his front. Kihyun throws a fresh pair of his own underwear at him, blushing furiously, while Changkyun just gives him a lazy grin in thanks.

He sets the younger boy down on his bed and towels his hair dry, stepping closer when Changkyun's nimble fingers pull at his sleep pants, his big warm palms landing on his hips. Kihyun's not a touchy person, he's fine with innocent friendly touches on neutral, society approved, appropriate areas of his body. Yet, Changkyun pulls him even closer, in between his legs, and plants his face right into his stomach, circling his arms around his waist.

Kihyun finds that he doesn't want to move away, even if the world would end right now.

Ultimately, Changkyun’s head lands on his pillow with still damp hair, twisting himself up in Kihyun's blanket with such a content expression on his face that he can't even be mad for show.

He looks at the boy in his bed. Changkyun both avoids his touches and doesn't. Kihyun simply can't figure out what he's thinking, but that's alright. No one really gets what Changkyun is thinking. Kihyun in return is all too easy to read. Changkyun once told him,

"It's very easy to read that you're both really complicated, and also, that you're really not."

Maybe that's why Changkyun is both avoiding him, and not. Is he avoiding him? Or is he giving him space? Is he respecting whatever he reads in Kihyun, something that not even Kihyun himself is aware of?

Kihyun doesn't know. He does know that every single one of Changkyun's touches, the touches he gives freely and voluntarily, are genuine. Even drunk, or tired.

Changkyun wouldn't hug him if he didn't want to.

And that's enough for Kihyun.

(He still climbs onto the blanket bundle that is Changkyun and knocks their foreheads together, internally coos at how Changkyun's nose scrunches up and at the little whine he lets out, and knocks them together again, until Changkyun lets go of the blanket and Kihyun can slip under it as well. In retribution, Changkyun plasters all of his barely clad body against Kihyun's soft pyjama front.

Kihyun just chuckles, fondly, so painfully fondly, drops a kiss on top of his hair, and reaches over to switch off the lamp. They'll both wake up hot and sweaty because as closely pressed together as they are there's no way it won't happen.

But that's alright, too.) 

**Author's Note:**

> Finally a fic again from Kihyun’s POV, crying happy tears
> 
> Feel free to not succumb to creators' call of checking out their messy social accounts.  
> [tumblr](https://ki-chang.tumblr.com)  
> [twitter](https://twitter.com/nkm284)


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